Wednesday, February 21, 2007

The Secret to a Successful Marriage is Bargaining

It's true. After 7 years, Dean and I have realized that it's all about give and take. You can do X if I can do Y. For instance, at the Cleveland Indians practice...

me, pointing to a group of players running across the field: "I didn't know Cleveland picked up Luis Rivas."

dean: "Sweetie, do I have your permission to punch Rivas in the face?"

me: "Only if I can sleep with Grady Sizemore."

dean: "Deal."

He makes a motion like he's walking towards Luis Rivas.

me: "No! You have to get a commitment from Grady first."

dean: "What am I supposed to do? Walk up to the both of them and say, 'Hey Grady, will you sleep with my wife?' and then when he says 'yes' up and cold cock Luis?"

me: "Exactly. Good luck."

6 comments:

Scott said...

What a rip off. Dean does all the work, gets his ass kicked, then has his wife sleep with another man.

Remind me to use you to negotiate a price for my house!

magnetbabe said...

Scott-
You're looking at it all wrong. Dean would be thrilled if a professional baseball player wanted to sleep with his wife. How often do you have something a professional athlete wants? ;)

brainhell said...

Would he be as thrilled to have you ddefiled by a crippled blogger?

lefty_grrrl said...

I like that deal! Grady Sizemore is yummy.

magnetbabe said...

brainy-
You're shameless!

lefty-
Grady wasn't really on my radar until I saw him up close. Wow. He signed a card for Dean and I got all giggly and giddy. It wasn't my finest moment.

lefty_grrrl said...

Oh, it's okay. I'm sure he's used to it. In fact, he's probably used to having to sign the tits flashed at him. I say you came off better than that. ;)